We rented rollerblades for overnight pricing at $13. Very cheap. And guess what? I fell down on my tailbone about ten times today, as well as skidded down a gravel slope on my right side. Yey for me, huh? My tailbone hurts like fucking hell right now. I can't sit down properly, can't bend, and can't lift my legs. I think if this continues for more than a week, I'll have to haul my ass off to a doc.

Anyway, that aside, I went to a breakwater at the beach while the other girls were off at the chalet pool swimming. I'd brought a book along, and had originally intended to read it. But when I sat down there, the howling wind and the breaking of the waves were so strong they formed a sort of sound barrier that blocked out all other human activities.

I closed my eyes and grounded. I managed to do so for a while, before I switched to another simpler type of just breathing in and out. I did it according to the breaking and withdrawing of the tide against the breakwater, and I shifted quite a bit. Apparently, I was quite amused with my rounded snout and my ears...ears especially. I flicked one forward, flicked the other forward, and felt the top of my head (skin?) contract slightly with that movement. I was tempted to start wiggling my ears or something, but that made me feel so silly I didn't. Howled twice...long and mournful, letting my pain lessen with the howls. Worked some.

Then, I closed my eyes again (after surveying the tides to make sure I didn't get trapped on the breakwater come high tide), breathing in and out. After a while, my eyelids started trying to lift on their own accord, and I ended meditating with my eyes almost fully closed, but not quite. And things got rather interesting here.

Singapore waters aren't the cleanest, I'll tell you that, despite our image as a green and clean city. The beach waters are grey, slicked with oil and stuff. But in my state of eyes half-closed, I saw a weak...vision? of blue waters before me, and the waves were coming from both sides of my vision, crashing onto a grey breakwater I was standing on. And the waters felt to be...mm...okay, if I put this into prose form, it'd be, "The waters were those that transversed all worlds and all realms, flowing between one world and the next, and the stone which sat in their midst marked the place where they met, where all destinies are one and infinite, and all things will come to pass."

Heh. Waxing lyric poetry.

Also, you know how sometimes, even with your eyes closed but there's sunlight shining on them, you can look into your own eyes(lids) and see lights and shadows? I saw that, and saw Wolf's form, Wolf's face. Kept seeing his/my nose. But I think I've finally seen how I really look like as Wolf. =) I watched the waves swirl around smaller rocks at the bottom of the breakwater, and wondered at how fluid the waters were, conquering a strong thing even like a rock. Then, I wondered what would conquer water, and the answer came to me as air. What can conquer air?

...
...
...

Nothingness. Void. And in understanding that I was void, I became all. That felt a lot like a lesson learnt, but what I learnt was elusive. I still can't grasp it.

Blah. Pain! Ass pain!